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here's what i want to know


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purely hypothetically, of course. okay, not hypothetically. here's what i want to know.
your phone breaks. let's say it's your text/mms messaging. you can't send or recieve, or both. or maybe the web on your phone isn't working. so, you call me, your friendly tech support monkey working at your cellular provider, schprink neckstale. you've been on hold for upwards of 30 minutes waiting patiently to hear my melodious "how can i assist you", so suffice it to say, you're in a fantastic mood and are radiating sunshine.

since you've been on hold for half an hour, it stands to reason that you might have heard, oh, say, once or twice, the automated message that plays between songs while you're on hold that says, and i quote "if you're calling from your cellphone, please hang up and call back from a landline or other phone so that our technical support representatives can assist you."

therefore - when i answer, and i have to tell you that i can't assist you or troubleshoot your stupid issue (that, nine times out of ten is caused due to user error anyway) because you are on your phone, why, oh, why do you get angry with me? i'm not the complete dumbass who disregarded the message that played once every 60 seconds you were on hold. gee, if you held for 30 minutes, then you had the opportunity to hear that message THIRTY times.
might i suggest you hang up and go to fao schwartz.com and buy yourself an etch-a-sketch to play with. clearly a cell phone is more advanced equipment than you're able to handle.

are you sensing my sarcasm? i'm laying it on pretty thick.


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  • I'm melissa mcgee
  • From Temple, Texas, United States
  • photographer. singer. soapcrafter. herbalist. dogmom. godmother. fantastic cook. i kiss better than i cook. [all photographs on this blog copyright melissa mcgee unless otherwise noted.]
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