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my name is melissa, and i can't read.


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the unthinkable has happened. i'm trying not to panic, but it's becoming increasingly difficult.

my tv is broken.

the audio is perfect, but there's something wrong with the picture; it's a bit like watching scrambled porn; everything is all wavy and line-y. i thought at first that maybe the cable had gone out, so i just figured it was one of those things that would pass and in the meantime i would just watch movies on dvd and keep checking back to see if the tv was back to normal.
i popped in a dvd, and horror of horrors, the dvd looked the same as the cable picture.

crap.
there's no point in getting it fixed; it's the picture tube and it would cost more than the tv is now worth to fix it, so i'm having the new tv delivered on monday. MONDAY. it's going to be a long weekend.
truthfully, i don't watch a lot of tv, meaning i don't sit in front of it and actually watch tv. it's on when i'm home, period. it's background noise more than anything; that comes from living alone for so long and not wanting to hear noises that i am certain would scare the crap out of me if i actually heard them. creaking floorboards. wind. house settling. the odd rat running around. with the tv on i don't have to hear those things; tv is definitely my favorite method of escapism. i only have one tv, and it's in my bedroom. i don't have a tv in the living room, by design; when i have company over, i want to be able to talk to them - i don't want to have to vie for their attention during a commercial break. i don't have company over very often to watch movies unless we're very close, as we'll be watching the movie from my bed.
that's not the sort of thing that inspires great comfort when you're a casual aquaintance with someone, although i'm certain more than a few families started that way...

i am, admittedly, a tv head. even though it rarely has my undivided attention, i have to have it on. the first step is admitting i have a problem. i have a definite routine even though i don't necessarily watch tv, and it is very rare for me to have anything on that one could classify as "reality" television as i eschew all things reality. i freakin' hate reality tv - i turn on the tv to get AWAY from reality, not to watch somebody else's. (which is ironic because reality tv is so often very obviously scripted; truth be told, most people are boring as hell and nobody would watch if there wasn't someone behind the scenes stirring the pot just to kick up the "reality" anti-plot.)
it started out - to the best of my recollection - with survivor, and it all went downhill from there. now any b-list celebrity and washed up former celebrity and even a celebrity who only enjoyed 14.5 minutes of fame has a damn reality show. you don't even have to be a celebrity to have a reality show. i'm sure i'll be getting my reality show sometime this year.
i hate reality tv.
except rollergirls on A&E. rollergirls rock. okay, and sometimes dog the bounty hunter. i'm only human. it's so cheesy i can't watch it without crackers. admittedly, i watch it for dog's wife, beth. any chola who chases down bail-jumping white trash while wearing pole-dancing shoes gets my attention. she kicks ass, but i digress.
none of that matters right now though, because i'm not watching ANY tv, at least until monday. i'm watching wavy, wiggly lines...

that is totally and completely and without any doubt, the suck.
god, i wish i knew how to read...


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  • I'm melissa mcgee
  • From Temple, Texas, United States
  • photographer. singer. soapcrafter. herbalist. dogmom. godmother. fantastic cook. i kiss better than i cook. [all photographs on this blog copyright melissa mcgee unless otherwise noted.]
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